Dealing With Breakups

Posted on Posted in Parenting

Many a times our relationships don’t work, after all nothing lasts forever. It can be due to any reason but after sometime we start moving away from the person who was the most vital part of our lives for a really long. First of all we try to put it off and deny it but when the reality starts hitting us, we get scared. We might still try to hold on to the relationship and avoid a break up or a divorce keeping the child in mind, thinking what might the child have to go through due to the divorce. Still sometimes we prefer breaking up rather than punishing themselves.

This is a very tough period for both the parents and the child. You can consult kidsafterseparation.com, if you are having any kind of problem and you can also consult them if you want some kind of help. Remember that if your kid is small then it’s going to very tough for him as he will not what is happening around him as the people he used to consider one, will be no more and he will have to see them separately after this. That’s a lot to ask from someone, who is still into cartoon. You will need to explain it to him carefully as to what is happening and what his role will be and what his position is. It is going to pretty difficult and hectic for him to see his things and time get divided between two people in two different locations. It is going to be difficult for him to see his parents separated and not tell each other those three magical words again. You need to provide your child with the best support that is possible from his parents and other relatives. He will take time to get used to it. One of the best ways to make him go through this stage is, doing things with him that he likes.  It’s very important to understand that is a delicate time and you should be sensitive now.

Co-Parenting After a Divorce

Now comes the ‘Me’ part. Self therapy really helps during this time. Even though you broke for some reason and you are supposed to move on from something that used to make you unhappy but moving on will make you unhappy too as breaking up leaves us vulnerable and insecure. Everything gives us nostalgia and we want to go back but always remember that you had decided to end it for a reason.

You will feel a lot of emotions together, like anger towards yourself. You will be angry towards your ex who is very normal but then it will go after sometime. Don’t over think which might make you take extreme steps. There might be guilty about the instances that you think that you could have handled better or something that you think might have saved the relationship.

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There might be fear about your future and what you will do now, the break up might make you clueless as you get completely freed from your responsibilities of another person. Keep calm and think, do all the things that you always wanted to do but couldn’t because your ex didn’t want to. There might also be fear that your ex might take control of your child and that you might not be able to meet your child ever again. There is no reason to fear if you haven’t ever done anything wrong.

Learn to accept your fear and don’t be scared of moving on. Remember that everything is a learning experience and learn from your mistakes to bring out the best in you. Move on and start on your new journey.

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